Carol Kedward, then of the University of Sussex in the UK, once told me that people only appeared to be mostly ornery and imbued with a frustrating “cussedness”. Carol went on to talk fondly of the most awkward and cynical people she knew – I’m unsure if her husband Rod was placed amongst these – as expressing something fundamentally human, the value of which we would do well to acknowledge and hold in the highest regard.

I’m talking about the most British of qualities – bloodymindedness, intractability, resoluteness of position, spirited defiance, the not-easily-convinced gene. According to popular legend, these were the qualities which got us through World War 2 - it’s the spirit of the Blitz, the Bulldog breed, the stout Englishman (and woman) the home front, make do and mend, don’t let the b*stards grind you down.

“People are always more convinced by what comes out of their mouths than anyone elses” is one of the central tenets of my work. I may be well researched, am experienced in the field – hellsbells – an expert even, the audience may smile and nod and go off and carry on doing what they were doing anyway.

In 2007 I attended a training course run by Harvey Ratner from Brief Consultancy. Now Harvey is a top guy, a first class trainer and the whole Brief approach is wonderfully facilitative. At the end of an inspiring two days, following a warm round of applause in Harvey’s honour, I turned to the person next to me and asked her what she thought

“Fantastic” she said, then after a pause, “but it will never work around here”.

Beware – seeing isn’t believing, speaking isn’t hearing, telling isn’t knowing – the only form of learning is self-learning.

(If I my neighbour told me that she had a three-legged dog, I’d assume that the dog had an accident and sympathise – I’d probably believe her though. If she told me that it was a five legged dog, I’d have to go around and have a good look, possibly give the spare leg a bit of a prod, look again, get an explanation and a character reference to make sure that she wasn’t a compulsive leg-puller. If I then went back to tell my wife, she wouldn’t believe me and, let’s face it, neither would you…..)

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